I'm guessing most of you have an email address or 2,
or like me have more than you can remember some days even.
I bet you get those wonderful bogus emails too claiming you won a prize
from some lottery you know you didn't enter, or some distraught family member in some
far off country needing your help in securing hundreds of thousands of dollars
because the government there is trying to take it from them, etc.
I used to get about 10 a week, then being the arse I am I decided to help
the powers that be track them down and created this beautiful form letter
(You'll maybe want to change the president name to prime minister, etc. depending on your country
of origin although I don't think it'll matter really)
I copy and paste it now in a reply each time I get one and I'll tell you this,
for sure the number of these things I get, are now down to, 1 or 2 a month!!!
It might get you on a watch list, but if you have ever sent political humor
or been to a .gov web site you're already on one anyway so it's not a big deal,
I'm sure I'm on hundreds of those lists myself and don't even care,
but this will get the reciever of the reply on those lists too with out a doubt!
So feel free to copy this and paste it into the next bogue email scam you get
and hit that send button, keep it up for a while and I'll be willing to bet
you'll start getting far less of these in the future too :o)
Enjoy and have fun and feel free to edit it to suit your desires and needs as well!
Just keep as many "flag" words in there as possible ;o)
Peace Within to you One and All!
Peace Out for now,
Stephen/SR386.
+Start Form Letter Text+
======================================================
Dear (who ever sent you the bogus email),
We are delighted to inform you that the FBI, DEA, DOD, US Army, and other US Federal agencies
are about to drive a tank armed with nuclear weapons through your doors tomorrow morning because
we found out about your plans to assassinate the President Of the United States of America!
You would be serving yourselves well to just give up now and shoot yourselves before we arrive
at 10:15 AM or a time we feel is acceptable possibly earlier or maybe later.
Please send us your complete address, license and registration and government ID numbers
so we may verify that you are indeed the assholes we need to destroy and we'll send you a
complimentary box of cyanide tablets to try risk free for 24 hours!
Your order for Rocket Launchers and other WMD's cannot be fulfilled properly without proper
and verifiable identification so please rush your information to this web address
https://complaint.ic3.gov/Default.aspx and we'll be sure your order is promptly
placed and rushed via special delivery person within
3 days maybe 2 depending on how well you complete our forms and as long as
you haven't eaten any doughnuts for the past 23 &1/2 hours.
If you ordered the 1 day special LAW Rocket package, we are sorry to inform you that
supplies have run out but you may place an order for any number of antipersonnel mines
at this site www.cia.gov during regular business hours on any weekday!
We would like to thank you for being the 200,000th idiot to try and screw your own assholes
by sending out these beautiful informative emails which the governments of more than 5 countries
are currently monitoring and compiling enough data via the return to sender offender program
which will locate you within .0004 seconds upon this email arriving on your server!
Have A Nice Day :o)
Sincerely,
George W. Bush.
President of the United States Of America!
PS: Please don't forget to place your one time order for our special edition Map of the White House
in Washington DC! It's only 200 trillion US dollars and available in
50 designer colours and patterns to match your Prison Cell décor.
Wow!! LOL 